It’s the first light of morning and I can hear an alarm going off. I moan and shift still half asleep. It’s not mine I don’t usually ever set an alarm, its for the hubby. He silences it in the groggy way one does at this time of the morning. He is usually up before me and off to the gym. He comes back and we trade. But not today. He had a late night of work and the gym will have to wait. He rubs my shoulder and whispers an admonishment for me to continue to sleep he knows I did not sleep well. But alas I am awake…Ugh I swallow and I feel the pain in the back of my throat and a throb in my head. It’s not quit the way I want to wake up any morning but definitely not on a Monday. This doesn’t bode well for the week.
I lay there knowing I have a window to decide how this is gonna go and it is closing fast.
I decide and carefully swing my legs over the side of the bed and hoist myself to my feet. I can feel the long busyness of yesterday along with tending to a sick child during the night in every inch of my body. I am tired and morning has come way too fast. My body lets me know what it thinks about me working out…NOT!
But through the haze I decide I am in charge… not my body and I need to run.
The crisp air hits me but it does little to alter the mood or the head throb but I press on.
I let my mind wander and it rests on a friend who is caring for her Mom who is going through the journey of Cancer. I say a prayer for her as my footfalls in a familiar cadence. I send her visions of this early morning light and prayers of grace. After her many others come to mind. Those who are suffering, those who are grieving, those who are out of a job, out of a home, out of love. And as I move I pray and as I pray I become a moving tide of gratitude. I think of all of those who would love to be on this mountain this morning doing just this. I think of those who would love to tend to a child or roll over next to a husband or clean a house or wash some clothes. Those who with just a smidgen of health or freedom would love to chase their dreams just one more day and my breathing steadies in determination my legs feeling less like lead.
I let the thankfulness fuel my thoughts of the day. I dedicate this day and all that it contains to those who can’t.
And as I round the last bend with my whole body in full forward motion I know that I will do it all #Because I Can…
And that makes all the difference.
Rest in Peace #MikeBrown